Lee and I have been friends for years, bonded not just by our love of Victoria Wood, but also by our less cheery days of despair over our careers. We have this term, ‘dishwasher day’, born because Lee would sometimes wake to find his only purpose in life was to load and unload the dishwasher. I don’t have a dishwasher, but have spent many a barren hour getting busy with the J-Cloth. Another friend spends his dishwasher days playing computer solitaire.
Many people experience these awful days which are marked by lethargy, boredom and an underlying feeling: there must be something out there for you to get your teeth into but having no idea what.
A few months back, my career prospects looked bleak and, as regular readers know, I began a programme of life coaching: a 12 week process designed to lead you towards accomplishing career goals.
I didn’t make it to the end. By week ten, I was already too busy. I have a new job, a new career even, in television production; I’m launching my own website to offer professional writing services and I have picked up a column in a new magazine. Proud though I am, I don’t share these wonderful outcomes simply to gloat, but to let others know they too can achieve their goals.
For those of you living with HIV for some time and who feel you cannot work because you lack energy or because you have been ‘out of the game’ for too long, I urge you to think again. In the four years I have been positive, I have spent lots of time without work. I felt run-down, a little depressed and prone to every cold and cough going. Strange then that the year I spent working my butt off, touring Europe on a bus, thrashing my limbs and straining my voice twice a night in a rock musical, was the time that I felt physically fabulous. I was pushing my body to its limits, yet I was in perfect health. Now, I’m working 12-hour days, flying around London in a hype of reality TV frenzy yet I feel wonderful. This is because happiness and fulfilment naturally promote good health. I’m certain of it. I have a job I love, and my body thanks me in return.
After my first column about life coaching, my coach was approached by an organisation
that helps people living with HIV. This is a really important step for those
given the death sentence in the eighties and early nineties. You were told
you would die; therefore you didn’t plan for the future. It’s not
your fault, any of us would have done the same. Now you have to accept the
fact that you will live. I’m not surprised some are still stuck in the
benefit trap, not knowing where to turn. Government responsibility should go
beyond providing toxic drugs, an array of steroids and some financial support,
then leaving us to it. I’m not suggesting doctors are to blame (I thank
God for the wisdom of mine) but how can a person really expect health and
happiness when they are left without a purpose in life?
I am lucky to have been diagnosed at a time when the ‘death sentence’ was a thing of the past. I’ve never really believed I would die from this virus. But no matter what your state of health, there can be something out there for you, something you will enjoy that can also earn you an honest living. If you believe that you will never find it, or that it is out of your reach, I urge you to give life coaching a shot and you too can make dishwasher days a thing of the past.
