THERAPY OF THE MONTH
EXERCISE: A PULSE FOR LIFE
Counter the ravages of HIV and find new passion with exercise, urges Steve Hall
Over a year ago my HIV consultant told me about a gym-based programme specifically
designed for people living with HIV and Aids. All I had to do was contact
London’s Central YMCA for details about their Positive Health Programme.
After some reflection on whether such a course could be right for me, I decided
to make what felt like a supreme effort, and get involved. I had been diagnosed
since 1990 and knew the terrain of a sub-10 CD4 count. I knew also, from those
early days, the generalised panic felt by everyone close to me about what
looked like a bleak future. I had struggled with depression too.
Having navigated my way through the ravages of CMV’s temporary re-arrangement
of my face, in the form of a Bell’s Palsy, my self-confidence was showing
‘low to absent’ on my well-being gauge.
I clearly remember that first visit to the YMCA; it was a mix of anticipation
and apprehension. I’d always wanted to join in with the lads in games
at school, but had singularly failed to impress. I was, after all, a sensitive
musician. But in the hands of friendly experts in a centre of excellence like
the YMCA, things started to slot into place.
My ‘new starters’ group was a mixed bunch of guys with widely
differing stories of struggle and hope. They were encouraging and full of
optimism. Initial mutual support was soon established between us as our mentored
programmes commenced, and it seemed as if some of my social isolation was
indeed coming to an end at last.
Since those early days, thanks to programme updates provided by my excellent
and caring mentor, I now enjoy membership of the club and do my work-outs
as often as I can (I aim for three times a week, and hate to miss one).
So why am I passionate about my gym programme?
The answer lies in the way physical training has harnessed a combination of
elements. I have always been an imaginative guy, so the programme became an
anchor that routed me in my physical self. Through this discipline I find
I can practise something akin to a spiritual awareness.
It’s not that I use prayer to lift my weights (how un-sexy is that?)
although at times I have found myself in the chapel within the complex. It’s
more to do with feeling the return of strength to my body, the growth of muscles
and loss of an ill-defined stomach and a feeling that I too can have a body
at least somewhere approaching healthy.
There is an irresistible urge to achieve and improve and to make the most
of what is on offer. All these elements constitute a programme that has generated
its own pulse for life. Like a Mozart piano concerto, I have found I can un-lock
my own momentum and apply all this to keeping my body and mind positively
healthy.
Why the YMCA?
The YMCA Positive Health Programme stands out as a beacon in the world of
HIV and Aids. The course is run by a team of dedicated staff that never tires
in its commitment to providing a first-class service. They manage to do all
of that, and they still find time to chat, smile, and encourage.
As well as gym-based programmes, the course offers positive people complimentary
therapies, a swimming group and much more. I have really enjoyed diving at
Crystal Palace National Sports Centre and a hugely rewarding creative writing
course run by a highly acclaimed writer and teacher.
If you go down to the YMCA today you’ll find a place which doesn’t
have the aggressively competitive attitude of some local gyms, and there isn’t
even the slightest whiff of stigmatism as a result of HIV disclosure. If you
live too far from London, maybe you could try writing or phoning for some
advice on how to start at a gym more local to you.
My future gym programme?
There are still plenty of things to learn in order to maximise my opportunities
at the gym. I can learn to find a better inner balance as I begin my programme.
Until now, I have tended to rush through the programme with excited anticipation,
to make the most of my growing energy as I feel my body awake,
That is what it’s really all about: waking up to a body-centred life
after HIV has done its best to exhaust me mentally. I still have perspective
and haven’t become a health purist. (I haven’t even given up smoking
for example - yet). I know I should try to increase my aerobic exercise, so
I will endeavour to increase my rowing-machine stints, and maybe even sacrifice
the odd ride on my new Suzuki and cycle to the corner shop.
