Dear Santa,
I’m completely broke, struggling on minimum benefits and my health is dodgy thanks to this bloody virus and the drug side effects. I can’t stand most of my family, who I never see anyway, all my friends are out of town and it’s Christmas. Please help me not go mad with the little cash I do have on a booze and cannabis binge, or worse, call the whole thing off (I kid you not).
Yours,
Madge (hanging in there by a thread)
Words Santa Claus
Image Russell Plows
Madge,
sweetie!
I’m so glad you got in touch. I might not be able to sort out any of
your money, health and family relationship
problems, but when it comes to surviving Christmas, Santa is the man for you.
Follow these ten tips and I promise you will begin 2006 with a smile.
1 Sort out the practical stuff
As a positive person, feeling unwell is bound to make you feel even more vulnerable,
even if all your counts are fine. But the secret isn’t about doing well,
but feeling well. So if you’re feeling sick and mega depressed, go to
your clinic and get some support. Also make sure that you have an out-of-hours
number if your digestion goes doolally in the night or you end up swimming
in a night-sweat. Lastly, make sure you know when your clinic is closed over
the hols and that you don’t run out of meds.
2 Make sure the essentials
get done
This one’s easy: take your meds on time. Do this and all is possible;
don’t do it and you might really be in
trouble. So if you know you’re likely to
forget (eg, because of the wacky-backy), make sure you have a couple of doses
in your purse. You never know, it is possible, you might end up having fun
with a mate and forget to take them.
3 Send out Christmas cards
and emails early
It’s so easy to think you’re unloved when you’re alone.
So, trust me and send those cards out early and you’ll be stunned how
many you get back. Include non-Christian people too. Jews, Muslims, Sikhs,
Hindus… everyone in one way or another gets sucked in, er, I mean involved.
And a mantlepiece decked out with Christmas cards is a great way to prove
to yourself you’re not alone on this Earth.
4 Eat properly this Christmas
Lots of people think eating healthily is expensive. Rubbish! It’s often
cheaper than buying ready-meals. But if you’ve just never learnt how
to cook healthy food, your clinic will have a nutritionist to explain how
to do this. The basics to remember are
pretty simple: three meals a day, each one consisting of about 40 per cent
carbs (bread, pasta, bananas, potatoes, cereals), 40 per cent fibre (fruit
and veg) and 20 per cent protein and fat (meat, fish, eggs, pulses, etc).
As my gran used to say, ‘Ya gotta eat!’
5 Excessive eating and drinking
The best way to avoid pigging out on rubbish during the day is to have breakfast.
A simple bowl of porridge and an apple is enough. As for boozing this Xmas,
make sure it’s not on an empty stomach. If you do though, have a big
glass of water before going to bed and some cereal. I’m a Frosties man
myself.
6 Make a plan for Christmas Day
OK, you’ve got no dosh and your friends have abandoned you... er, I
mean, visiting their family. What to do? Well, how about not blowing what
little cash you do have on booze and buy yourself a gift. Inside of you there’s
a little kid who also wants to have a treat. Imagine a little boy or girl
aged five, who’s very sad. Would you (a) give that kid a special present,
plan a sing-a-long to the Sound of Music and maybe go to the
funfair, or (b) ply him with alcohol to stop him whining? I plant the seed.
7 I really, really hate Christmas
OK, OK. How about avoiding it altogether and working over the hols? Lots of
people at a loose end over the festive season do voluntary work, especially
with those who sleep rough. And you might meet a lovely new partner. Last
year a young man called Michael wrote to me requesting a nice boyfriend for
2005. So I ‘arranged’ for him to meet a lovely chap called Graham
at a Christmas Eve soup kitchen in central London. And one year on, they are
still together. You just don’t know how things will turn out.
8 Deal with depression
This one can be a hard one, especially over Christmas when everything around
you says you should be surrounded by lots of people who love you and spend
masses of cash on gifts. If this is you, Madge, get help now before your clinic
closes. Have some helpline numbers handy. The big ones will have Christmas
cover. Also your local HIV support group should have something planned. You
are not alone.
9 Get out there!
The great thing about being in the UK is you’re never too far from a
nice walk, which can really lift your spirits. So ditch vegging out in front
of the TV with a box of chocs, put your trainers on and powerwalk up a hill
for some great winter exercise, which we all know is good for both mind and
body.
10 2006; make a plan
Madge, darling, what do you want next year? Whatever it is, write it down
and start to think how you might achieve it. Often the big things we want
are really just a chain of lots of little things. Or how about a holiday?
In January, prices come tumbling down. Maybe it’s a new partner? Try
and use that worrying energy on self-improvement. That’s it m’dear.
One last thing that’s important. Whatever you do, don’t compare
how you feel on the inside with how others look on the outside; chances are
under the gloss, lots of them are miserable.
Big kiss,
Love
SANTA
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