MP left us speechless
I’ve only just subscribed to Positive Nation after reading a reply to
the ‘Bad blood scandal’ news story (PN 120, March) while I was
at the clinic. I was infected with HIV in 1983 from a transfusion during surgery
for cancer. Although I became ill in 1999, I was not tested and diagnosed
with HIV until 2003. Last year, my wife contacted our MP, Ian Duncan Smith,
for assistance to try to get a more realistic settlement. His reply was: “What
do you expect me to do? There are plenty of solicitors who take on ‘no
win no fee’ cases.” He left us speechless. After reading your
‘inadequate settlements’ letter (PN 121, April) we are determined
to push for further assistance for us victims of this NHS foul-up.
Name and address supplied
Everyday strife
As an HIV positive man in my late fifties, I find the majority of my day-to-day
problems are not dealt with by magazines like yours. As someone who has lipodystrophy,
I find it
virtually impossible to find underpants made for someone without any buttocks.
I usually find they are always uncomfortable and ride up and I know I’m
not the only one with this problem. Is there any chance of PN doing a survey?
Or do any other readers have any suggestions? Another problem is exercise.
We are repeatedly told it’s as important as diet and while there is
masses of information on diet, it’s not possible to get the same degree
of support relating to exercise.
For example: does anyone know where there are support groups for exercise
in the South East? Enough moaning: great magazine. I always enjoy reading
it. Thanks.
Name and address supplied
The editor replies: Loss of fat from the backside is common but there
is a company that can help. Check out www.buttforyou.com;
they offer padded briefs that are comfortable and give your backside a ‘fuller’
look. As for exercise, read More Than A Pretty Face onpg 20, about plans to
roll out the YMCA’s Positive Health Scheme across the UK.
Why are we treated this way?
It’s a year since my HIV positive diagnosis and I’m still troubled
by the way HIV positive people have to live. Whenever I enter my clinic, no
one is happy and most seem close to tears.
It’s easy to understand why someone recently diagnosed would cry but
why is this still the case for people living with HIV for five years or more?
Half of the people I chat to there say the same: ‘Why did it have to
be me, why do I have to live like this?’
I’m fed up with the way the media portrays us and the way most of us
are treated like lepers. I’m sure this is why so many people with HIV,
even long-term survivors, still feel so low. It’s about time we were
treated as humans. An illness doesn’t define a person.
Andrew Nield
Condoms are best we have
My sympathies go to the gay man recently diagnosed with HIV despite maintaining
safer sex (Is Condom Advice Flawed?, Letters, PN 122, May). I understand his
confidence in condoms has been shaken, but sadly, it sounds like he was just
unlucky. Since 2002, GMFA and many other HIV agencies have advised that any
kite-marked condom is appropriate for anal sex based on the best research
we know of. For many years gay men in the UK were told they could only use
extra thick condoms, although there was no evidence to support this. It was
assumed anal sex meant more friction so extra strong condoms must be safer.
City University’s 2001 Condom Thickness evaluation was the first major
study to test this theory. It showed no significant difference in failure
rates between regular and extra thick condom types when used by gay
couples. Regular condoms are easier to find than extra thick ones and come
in a much wider variety of shapes and sizes, making it easier to find a comfortable
fit.
Many men report regular condoms as more sensitive, and so are more inclined
to use them. No condom is 100 per cent reliable, although the risk of condom
failure can be reduced by ensuring correct storage and usage and the right
sort of lubricant (see www.metromate.org.uk).
Research shows that men who consistently use
condoms suffer less condom failure, so practise really does make perfect.
But, even if all precautions are taken and all procedures correctly followed,
there remains a chance (and I stress that it’s a small chance) that
the condom will fail. Condoms, extra thick or otherwise, aren’t perfect,
but for men who have sex with
anyone who may have a different HIV status, they remain the best method of
preventing transmission that we have.
Matthew Hodson, GMFA
Worth sharing
Thank you for the most recent issue of Positive Nation. I picked it up from
the doormat as I rushed to my GPs surgery and read it in the waiting room,
but with the cover shielded by the plain envelope.
I have a great relationship with the doctors at my surgery, and am completely
open about my status. I’ve never had any difficulties, apart from maybe
keeping information flowing between my HIV clinic and the surgery.
I think it’s important to go to the GP first with health concerns, rather
than the clinic, so I read your article, A Question of Trust (PN 121, April),
with interest. However, I laughed out loud at the suggestion that GPs should
consider leaving PN in the waiting room as
a sign of openness. The article was about ‘family’ doctors and
indeed there were people of all ages waiting with me, including young children.
PN is an adult-only magazine, as the cover clearly states, and as many cover
pictures reinforce. So, I wonder, is it suitable for this particular audience?
I keep my copies of PN at work, because it’s not something I want my
seven-year-old daughter to find. I don’t want her to see some of the
more explicit adverts and imagery and think many family doctors would think
twice about leaving the magazine in their waiting rooms because of this. It’s
a shame, because lots of articles are worth sharing.
Christine Patterson, northern ireland
Rant about racism
Why do you allow your usually splendid publication to be used as a platform
for racist rants by your columnist Clayton Brown? While I applaud his new-found
self-esteem and determination to live life to the full since his diagnosis,
I’m baffled as to why he blames white people for all his past woes (A
Rush Of Self-Esteem, PN 122, May). Why does he expect so much from gay-owned
businesses? He states that “99 per cent of gay establishments are run
by white people and the only black faces are seen manning the door or toilet”,
as if there were some other wonderful plum jobs being denied to him. If working
behind the bar in some sleazy club for crap wages represents the height of
his ambitions, then Mr Brown still has some serious self-esteem issues. And
when did any gay business ever preach inclusiveness? Businesses are there
to make money and gay companies exist to make money from gay people of every
race.
You’re obviously comfortable publishing articles where a black writer
uses the phrase “white, gay men” in such a shockingly abusive
way, but you are compromising the inclusive ethos which, for me, has always
been a fundamental part of Positive Nation. You also risk alienating a large
section of your readership. Look at it this way, is there any situation in
which it would be acceptable for someone like me (a white, gay man) to use
the phrase “black gay men bitching about everything”? I don’t
think so.
Mr Brown would get over his prejudices if he realised that the gay scene exploits
everyone; business exploits workers, customers are ripped off and all men
are viewed as sex objects. That’s the way it’s always been and
we should not expect more. It’s a jungle out there: if you don’t
like it, don’t go there. Morality, inclusiveness and race don’t
come into it and the sooner Clayton Brown realises this, the sooner he can
move on.
edmund o’sullivan, london
Write to:
Letters, Positive Nation,
250 Kennington Lane,
London, SE11 5RD or email
editor@positivenation.co.uk
or fax 020 7564 2140.
Please include your address and phone number although these need not be published.
Letters may be edited for length. Views expressed in letters are not necessary
those of PN or the UKC
